ITNOWIT #12: A month has passed

Operation ITNOWIT #12

  • my place
  • Thursday 6/21/12
  • 3:00-7:15pm

B came over to my place again last Thursday. He brought a selection of movies from the library and some snacks, and I made some snacks, too. I changed my hours at work, so he was coming over after work rather than before. This meant that there was no set ending time, and I wondered how long he would stay and how it would go.

It went pretty well. We watched a movie and talked for a while afterward. He read Pride and Prejudice. I had talked about it before. We were talking about internet use and I mentioned that I watch The Lizzie Bennet Diaries on You.Tube. Then I babbled on about the impressiveness of Bronte’s vocabulary and how our vocabulary in the 20th century has shrunk so much (and there may have been a bit of Darcy-swooning as well). And he actually read it. Sigh. This both impresses me and makes me feel bad about not reading the two books he gave me. I mean, I’m trying. But Love in the Time of Cholera has almost no dialogue; it’s all narration. So it’s a really big adjustment from what I usually read and I’m having a tough time getting into it.

We talked travel and names (nicknames, middle names, popular names). The kind of talk that’s fun and interesting, and that made me realize after he’d gone that I’m still finding it difficult to know him. But there were moments that I felt myself relax and not worry about the level of liking that was happening between us. So that’s good, I think.

He did tell me that he doesn’t have internet at his house (along with no tv, which I already knew). He takes his laptop to the library instead, and downloads podcasts to listen to at home. He says it’s because if he had it at his house, he’d be on the internet all the time, rather than reading. Obviously, I completely understand that because that is my life right now. It reminded me of A pear by herself’s blogs about respecting your partner. I really respect what I know of B’s lifestyle. It makes me feel like I should really strive to limit my own internet use and read more (which I knew before I met B, of course). On the other hand, I don’t want to feel guilty about watching five episodes of Mad Men in a row. The good thing is that B doesn’t seem to be judgey about it.

He drove to a city many hours away this weekend for an interview. I can certainly say that I  don’t want him to move far away. I do want to see where this is going, if it’s going anywhere. We’ve been spending time together for a month now. I keep trying to imagine how we’re going to get to the next step, since I can’t bring myself to “make the next move.” It certainly doesn’t seem like we’ll just talk it out. (“So, are we dating or what? Because if we are, shouldn’t there be touching involved?”) And it certainly doesn’t seem like things will just progress. (We’re sitting on the couch together watching a movie and somehow we’re holding hands…)

A month ago, I wouldn’t have imagined that I’d be here, hanging out with a sweet, literate guy. A month from now, who knows what will happen?


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