Operation ITNOWIT #15
- B’s place
- Tuesday 7/10/12
- homemade pizza
After wondering how B felt about not communicating for a few days (since we spent the day together Wednesday), I emailed him Sunday evening. I asked about his weekend and then asked if he thought it was odd that it had been a few days, saying that I didn’t think so, but perhaps I’m odd. I added that I hoped he didn’t think I was ignoring him and asked if he wanted to get together Tuesday. I figured I should make the effort to be the one doing the inviting sometimes.
When he replied he said he didn’t know if it was odd because he didn’t know what my/our norm was. Then he admitted it was a bit suspenseful and he wondered what he might or might not have said… I love that he owned up to that. He invited me to his place for pizza and a movie and I accepted, adding that I hadn’t meant to keep him in suspense.
When we’re apart I find myself feeling calm and good about him. I am able to imagine where things will go. To think that, yes, eventually we will figure things out. We will kiss. (For pete’s sake!) We will learn how to be physically comfortable with each other. I find myself believing in that possibility. But when we’re together we’re pretty darn awkward still. Everything is said in that sort of shy, smiley tone, like we don’t want to step on each other’s toes. Can’t get too serious, can’t admit too much. I’m not sure how to move forward, but there’s nothing to do but keep spending time together.
And so I went to his place for the second time. We sat and talked a while. I read the backs of all the movies he’d picked up from the library. None of the choices were particularly confidence inspiring or alluring. He chose a Russian one (yay) but it was a wartime suspense plot (boo). He picked a quirky comedy (yay) but it was about a boy determined to lose his virginity (uh…awkward much?).
I talked quite a lot (again), but I hope he didn’t feel like the conversation was too one-sided. When you’re just getting to know someone, one question leads to so much backstory. At least it does when I’m the one talking. =) We talked about high school (neither of us ever went to parties) and college. He learned that I left high school halfway through my junior year to start at the community college. High school was not a happy time; college was better. “So,” he said with a smile, “when you said you didn’t date in high school, you meant for those two and a half years?” And what could I say but yes? I could have said, I didn’t date when I was high school aged, but that’s getting too close to begging the question, at what age did I date?
I like him. I like him more the more we’re together. He said he could probably live on rice and beans and my heart gave a little leap. Seriously. I know it’s not a sign that we’re soul mates that we both go for the simple whole grain/legume combo, but it’s a sign of compatibility. And he made the pizza dough. And put basil and oregano in it. I meant to help him more with the pizza, but I felt awkward (shocking!) about being in someone else’s kitchen with not a lot of counter space, and wielding a knife while being upright at the same time, etc., etc. So I kinda just watched until he handed me the bowl of chopped up toppings to put on the pizza. I did ask what I should do, but I think his answer was ‘whatever you normally do,’ which meant that I stayed where I was. I like that there were dishes in the sink. I like that when he handed me a napkin, it was a folded dishtowel.
B reads. A lot. This is a very good quality for a librarian, of course. I’d lent him The Perks of Being a Wallflower because he said he’s never really read young adult literature. He admitted that it took him a while to get into it. I don’t think he disliked it as much as I disliked Love in the Time of Cholera, but he maybe his was being polite. =) I also gave him Joel Bakan’s The Corporation and Jane Goodall’s Harvest for Hope last week and he’s finished them. Does this make me feel a bit guilty about not having read Dead Souls yet? Why yes, yes it does. Honestly, he just keeps impressing me, with the cooking and the reading…it’s a very good thing.
Then he went and asked if I wanted to go see the screening of Singin’ in the Rain. I said, “Are you asking me only because you know I want to go, or because you want to go?” He said he’d want to go either way, but I’m not sure I believe him. =) Regardless, it makes me really happy that he asked. Yes. I like him.
The movie we ended up watching was very odd and not a little disturbing, but B thought so too, so that’s good. Watching the movie projected onto his living room wall was really fun. Quite like going to the movies. It was late when it ended, but we talked a little more (back at the kitchen table, not the couch) until he asked if it was past my bedtime and I admitted that it was.
So he drove me home (we forgot my leftover pizza–drat!), and if all goes well I see him again on Thursday.